It may not make sense, but the best way to get you hurt least may be to hurt you the most. And it hurts me too.

No one ever said life was easy, but nobody said it had to be hard either. But life just is.

I wish I didn't have to be like this. I don't want to hurt anyone really. I don't want to lie to anyone. And I don't want anybody to have false hopes either.

So, trust me, give up on me. I'm just not worth loving.

won't you let go now? can't you see why i want you do to so?

was the fourth meant to kill me the fastest?

were words meant to deceive me?

was the truth meant to make me stop believing?

and were you just an illusion?

I know when I change my mind. It's when, someone else can make my heart skip a beat, or remind me of practically everything he does. And obviously, when he's stuck in my head.

sometimes it comes to a point where you can't help it any more.

Allow me to make mistakes, cos i know i will.

I may not be right this time, but you never know.

and i will take this risk because,

you told me i was pretty when i looked like a mess.

Marc told me today that he missed me cos we hadn't talked for a long time.

and now i'm thinking what the words "i miss you" mean to me.

honestly, i miss a lot of people, a lot of things. now this is referring to a lot of different people.

i miss how we used to talk and meet up. but things changed. i changed.

i miss how we'd talk all day. but then all contact was cut off. what happened?

i miss how i could talk about you to others. but you changed.

and lastly,

i miss...being wanted. i miss how it feels like for someone to want me. how someone would do anything for me.

and that's how i feel for someone too. and why the hell would that someone want to let this chance slip away? who knows, there may never be anyone else who'd want you.

and then another question. where did i screw up? for things to have changed and made me miss the past?